How Do Children Feel About Being Adopted?

One of the most common — and heartfelt — questions we hear from women considering adoption is:

“How will my child feel about being adopted?”

It’s a powerful question. And if you’re thinking about making an adoption plan, it shows how much love and care you already have for your baby’s future. At Tapestry Adoption, we walk with expectant moms through every part of the process — including the emotional parts. And when it comes to how adoptees feel about their experience, the good news is:

Children who are adopted often grow up with love, belonging, and gratitude

Let’s look at what real adoptees say, and what the research tells us about how adopted children truly feel.

What the Research Says

It’s not just stories — data backs this up too. A report from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services called Adoption USA examined over 2,000 adoptive families across the country and found:

85% of adopted children are in excellent or very good health
They are more likely to have health insurance
They are less likely to live in poverty
68% were read to every day (vs. 48% of non-adopted children)
73% were sung or told stories to daily (compared to 59%)
More than half perform excellently in reading, language arts, and math

These numbers paint a hopeful picture — one we see echoed daily at Tapestry Adoption through the lives of families we’ve worked with.

Real Relationships Over Profiles

At Tapestry, we’re a small, ethical agency that believes in real relationships, not just paper profiles. We don’t hand you a book and ask you to pick a family. Instead, we get to know each adoptive family and walk with you to find the one that truly fits — based on values, personality, and mutual connection.

This helps many expectant moms feel confident in their choice and gives adopted children a story rooted in intention, love, and personal connection.

What About Open Adoption?

One of the biggest shifts in modern adoption is the rise of open and semi-open adoptions.

According to research from the Donaldson Adoption Institute, 95% of today’s adoptions include some level of openness — meaning there’s ongoing communication between birth and adoptive families.

And for children, that openness can be incredibly beneficial.

“I’m a happy, well-adjusted adult (or at least as much as any of us are!) because I grew up with an open adoption,” shared Graci, an adult adoptee.

At Tapestry, we encourage open adoption whenever possible because we’ve seen how it:

Helps adoptees understand their full story
Builds a sense of identity and continuity
Offers access to important health and family history
Allows children to develop positive feelings toward their birth mother

We support and guide both birth and adoptive families in forming respectful, healthy, lasting relationships — always at your comfort level

Adoption, Identity, and Emotional Well-Being

Some expectant moms ask:

“Will my child resent me for this?”

This is a deeply personal and emotional question — and one that deserves an honest answer.

From our experience and research, children raised in loving, open adoptive homes — with age-appropriate honesty about their adoption — tend to grow up with peace and confidence in who they are.

In fact, many adopted children and teens report:

A clear understanding of the reasons for their adoption
Feeling loved by both birth and adoptive families
Confidence in their personality, genetics, and story
A sense of pride in their identity as an adoptee

If you want to hear directly from adoptees, there are many powerful stories available from adult adoptees and youth alike. You can read more here or here.

What’s Next?

Choosing adoption isn’t easy. It’s a decision filled with emotion, courage, and love.

At Tapestry Adoption, we’re here to walk with you — not just through the paperwork, but through all the questions and feelings that come with it. We’re proud to be a licensed Indiana adoption agency, with high ethical standards and a hands-on, personal approach.

If you’re searching for terms like “give up baby for adoption” or “Indiana adoption help,” we invite you to reach out. You don’t have to do this alone — and it doesn’t have to feel like “giving up.” You’re making a plan. You’re making a way.